I can’t have nice things because:

February 9, 2010 § 1 Comment

1. If you hand me something shiny and new (iPod, cell phone, camera, baby), I will drop it on a surface hard enough to leave a mark.

2. After using my shiny new pasta maker for the first time on Sunday, I washed it with water and it promptly seized up. Now it doesn’t work, though I’m hoping that minor surgery and heavy lubrication will help.

3. It’s physically impossible for me to keep food off new clothing.

4. The two times I forgot to take my wedding rings off before a bike ride, I got my (left) hand stuck between the back wheel & the frame while trying to clean off glass, wrenching the stone over & scuffing the metal.

(etc.)

In short, I can’t have nice things because I am a messy klutz. So when I look like I’m wearing clothes that I bought on clearance in the little boys’ section…yeah, I probably am.

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